Sunday, March 1, 2009

Celebrity Apprentice: Kotu versus Athena!

Celebrity Apprentice: Kotu versus Athena!


On the new season of NBC’s Celebrity Apprentice, the contestants will be split into two groups. It will be the men: Herschel Walker, Jesse James, Scott Hamilton, Clint Black, Andrew Dice Clay, Brian McKnight, Dennis Rodman, and Tom Green, versus the women: Annie Duke, Joan Rivers, Melissa Rivers, Brande Roderick, Claudia Jordan, Khloe Kardashian, Natalie Gulbis, and Tionne Watkins. Donald Trump tells them they will be doing battle - for charity. He instructs them to go back to Trump Tower and choose their team name and their project manager. For the ladies, project manager will be Joan Rivers, and the name will be Team Athena. For the men, the project manager will be Herschel Walker, and the name will be Kotu (King of the Universe).


The teams report back to the Trumps to report their decisions. Donald tells them that their first Celebrity Apprentice assignment is going to be to create and sell cupcakes on the streets of New York! The team to make the most money will prevail. After Andrew Dice Clay complains about the lack of food in their rooms, Donald ignores him and announces that his son, Don, will go with the women, and his daughter, Ivanka, will go with the men.

As the men try to decide on a game plan, they agree that Andrew Dice Clay is the king of New York, and they need to take advantage of that, in fact, they feel that Kotu has more recognizable celebrities than Athena overall! The women of Celebrity Apprentice bicker about Joan’s suggestion that they locate on the east side. Annie points out that on last season the hot-dog sellers were criticized for going to Penn Station. Brande offers that the entire Playboy building is willing to come out to help if they locate near there! Annie alienates the group by calling her friend Tony to come and buy cupcakes to make her look good. Back in the men’s room, Jesse James is offering to amp up the truck, thereby making a contribution to the effort.


Tom Green is on the phone with an acquaintance from television, trying to secure a cupcake donation. Next, Kotu meets with the chefs to plan what type of cupcakes they will make. Andrew Dice Clay refuses to don a chef’s hat, but does wear the apron. Jesse arrives in the kitchen to take pictures for the truck. Half of the members of Athena are also in their kitchen, discussing with the chef that they would like to do simple cupcakes - chocolate and vanilla. They will make 750 - 1000 cupcakes. The other half of the team is dealing with the truck and flyers. Joan Rivers wants bubbles coming out of the truck. Kotu members, Jesse and Brian are meeting with a computer design guy to create the truck decals. Joan, Melissa, and Brande do the same.

Herschel Walker and Dennis Rodman are in the Celebrity Apprentice kitchen cracking 105 eggs for their cupcakes! Scott Hamilton is weighing chocolate and Clint Black comments that the whole task was very labor intensive. Andrew Dice Clay sits out the baking, refusing to help make the cupcakes, but declaring that he has arranged to do a couple of Sirius radio shots to promote the sale. He takes Dennis Rodman with him, who confronts him on his lack of effort. Clay admits it - he doesn’t want to make cupcakes!

The women’s team is progressing nicely with their product - pretty vanilla cupcakes! Unfortunately, their chocolate cupcakes sink in the middle. Annie wonders if Natalie’s mixing technique is to blame. With an hour to go for baking, Annie calls the other half of the team for back up.

Celebrity Apprentice’s Jesse and Brian return to the kitchen from the graphic design place, and they discover that there is some issues with the team, having to do with Andrew Dice Clay and Dennis Rodman having left the others to do all of the work. Suddenly, the men discover that they have a big problem - their cupcakes taste terrible - they forgot to put the sugar in. After some thought, they go with a technique where they brush on liquid sugar and let in soak in!


Back in the kitchen belonging to Celebrity Apprentice’s Athena, the women have decided to fill the sunken chocolate cupcakes with ganache. Claudia is fed up with Annie Duke being so bossy and talking non-stop. Joan Rivers likens her to Mussolini!

On the day of the Celebrity Apprentice cupcake sales, team Athena members decorate their truck with ‘Cupcakes Care’ decals. The Kotu team slogan is ‘Celebrity Cupcakes’. They head to Times Square and charge twenty dollars per cupcake. They do a brisk business, posing for fan photos as they sell! The women are also selling, but not for as much per cupcake, and they worry that the men’s sports star connections will spell trouble. Team Kotu amps things up even more by placing a naked, guitar-playing guy on top of the truck! Not to be outdone, however, the women are getting some help from the Playboy bunnies! Don pays Team Athena a visit, just as they are soliciting sales from a double-decker bus full of tourists!

Back at the Team Kotu truck, Celebrity Apprentice contestant Dennis Rodman seems to be hiding inside the truck. Tom Green points out that he is an attraction and needs to be out. When Herschel doesn’t do anything about it, Tom goes in and entices Dennis out. Ivanka arrives and notes that Dennis seems lackadaisical. Down at the women’s truck, Eric Benet is paying a visit to help out. Some of Annie Duke’s poker friends come down and purchase cupcakes for as much as $1000 apiece! Soon, Herschel and Joan get a call from Donald Trump. He tells them to pick their best cupcake and take it to Crumbs Bakery. The best tasting cupcake will get an extra $15,000 toward their bottom line! Both teams take great care in selecting the perfect choice. Andrew Dice Clay and Melissa Rivers are the delegates who take the teams’ selected cupcakes to the bakery. The owner tastes them both and says she’ll let Donald Trump know which she preferred. When Melissa returns to the truck, she is confronted by her team members, who are disappointed that she took the chocolate ganache rather than the favorite vanilla chocolate chip.


Team Athena soon has a new issue to deal with - someone wants to buy the whole truck of cupcakes, but Annie won’t let them - she is worried about running out before a big spender shows up. Brande is fed up and goes to Joan. The remainder of the cupcakes are sold for $9000. Annie is upset that they sold out with 15 minutes of sale time left - an argument ensues. Over at Team Kotu’s truck, there is 10 minutes remaining, and they are raking in thousands of dollars in sales on Celebrity Apprentice - including one cupcake for $4000! With two minutes left, Tom Green scores a check for $10,000 from Donny Deutsche of television’s The Big Idea!

The teams reconvene in the Celebrity Apprentice boardroom with Donald Trump and his kids. He asks Joan Rivers who was the star from her team - she says it was Brande. He asks Claudia who is the least effective member of the team, and she says that personality-wise, it’s Annie. She is unapologetic for taking control of the situation. Trump next asks Herschel who the weak link on Kotu is, but he demures that there wasn’t one. Andrew Dice Clay pipes up and says he had no interest in baking, but he does impressions that even Donald can’t do! Trump wonders if Dennis Rodman is the most recognizable celebrity in the group, and if they used that. Herschel says they wanted to, but Dennis was reluctant to get out of the truck and work!

The results are in from Crumbs Bakery - Team Athena won by a mile - the men’s cupcakes were disgusting! Ivanka next says that the men brought in over $49,000 in cupcake sales. To everyone’s surprise, Don announces that the women raised over $61,000 dollars! Donald congratulates Joan and the ladies, and sends them back to Trump Towers, inviting them to watch the grilling of the men if they like!

Team Athena busts out the bubbly back at their room in Trump Towers. They get comfortable and prepare to watch the Celebrity Apprentice men’s team face The Donald. Tom Green is defending himself against accusations that he was uptight. He explains that he brought in some big donors. Jesse James explains that his friends don’t have money, and offers the insight that Dennis Rodman was the most visible celebrity. Donald asks about the bad taste of their cupcakes. He asks Scott and Andrew who they think is responsible for the disgusting product. Andrew says that he is the biggest celebrity and defends his choice to go on the radio. When determining the weakest member, Herschel and Dennis get into it over Dennis not getting out of the truck. Dennis claims it was enough for Tom to holler in the street for people to go see him in the truck. Next, Herschel is attacked for not taking more of a leadership role in the kitchen. Donald asks Clint if he were him, who would he fire? Clint sighs at being put on the spot.

Ultimately, Clint Black says he would fire Andrew Dice Clay - he worked the least. Andrew defends himself, and Donald asks if he’s quitting - if he does, he’ll be forever considered a Celebrity Apprentice loser! Andrew won’t quit, and blurts that he would fire Scott! Scott, in turn, points the finger at Dennis and Andrew. Brian McKnight also says Andrew. Jesse says he would fire Dennis. Tom says it should be Herschel that goes - he was the project manager! Donald tells Herschel to pick two others to come back into the boardroom with him to face firing - he chooses Dennis and Andrew. Donald tells the women that they cannot watch anymore.


After the rest of the men have left, Herschel, Andrew, and Dennis wait outside the boardroom. Ivanka and Don give their father their opinion. Donald calls them back in, and immediately asks Dennis whom he would fire. Dennis says Herschel - he didn’t use him properly. Andrew is also asked whom he would fire - he says Herschel as well. Herschel counters that he sent Clay over to the bakery with the cupcake because he was the only one not working - still! Herschel says that Andrew wanted to do his thing - but not to work! Donald speaks again - pointing out that Dennis and Herschel really fought to stay, and Andrew threatened to quit. Donald says he knows Andrew isn’t a quitter, but he’s fired! Ivanka and Don tell their father that he did the right thing.

First to be fired on Celebrity Apprentice - Andrew Dice Clay!



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